News and Abuse: EASTER AN-EGG-DOTES

Here are some rather interesting and funny anecdotes involving Easter that I have received randomly by E-mail.

My name is Mr Hunt and I am a primary school teacher and last year as a little fun for the children I dressed up as an Easter Egg and hid in the school playground while the pupils tried to find me, we called the whole exercise an Easter Egg Hunt as a pun on my name. The kids didn't really get it but I thought it was bloody hilarious.

C. Hunt, Torquay

A few years ago I dated this girl called Karen, she was pretty, funny, intelligent, everything I could wish for in a girlfriend, but after a few months she became more and more obsessive, calling and texting me constantly throughout my day and getting insanely jealous if I even looked at a member of the opposite sex. Eventually I decided to break it off with her. Shortly afterwards I was invited to a 30th birthday party on Good Friday, it was to be fancy dress and Easter was the theme, my flatmate Ed was going as the Easter bunny and was ready waiting for me at the flat, I was running late after being stuck at work, when I got a text from Karen telling me she was at the flat with Ed . I immeadetley began to panic and rushed back, but it was too late, there was Ed boiling in the saucepan.

Mark, Gateshead

I heard this story, I'm not sure if its entirely true but some of my friends swear by it, there was this man who lived in the area years ago and apparently he was nailed to a wooden cross or something by a load of nasty people for lying to them or something. Anyway it was a complete over-reaction and he was pronounced dead at the scene, well this was on the Friday. The family obviously were devastated and planning to have him buried when suddenly on the Sunday two days later, he came back to life. Amazing.

Cheryl, Bethlehem

I work in an office and all the staff decided this year we would all quit something for lent, some stopped smoking, others stopped drinking, I decided to stop shagging all the blokes in the office, which hasn't been easy I can tell you. Anyway there is this girl called Martha, who bless her is rather large and not to mention stinks of TCP, she said she was giving up Easter eggs for lent, what comes after lent? Easter! we just fell about the place.

Kirstie, Liverpool

I once saw Take That's Gary Barlow eating a Cadbury's Creme Egg at Kew Gardens. He made a right mess of it as well.

Howard, Kew Gardens

EASTER EGGHEADS

Ever wondered what BBC TWO'S fountain of knowledge the Eggheads favourite chocolate Easter Egg is, well wait no longer.